The Other Side of Erised :: Desire fo edis rehto - Quibbler, December 1975. Holiday Edition

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Dec 22, 2009, 6:30pm

The Other Side of Erised :: Desire fo edis rehto :: In Character :: Newspapers :: The Quibbler :: Quibbler, December 1975. Holiday Edition

Poll

Poll Question: What do you think of Pukors?

Poll Options:

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They definately need to be watched.

(1 vote, 25%)

I might keep an out for them.

(0 votes, 0%)

I still think it's an ordinary Plimpie.

(1 vote, 25%)

I'm impervius to them. They cannot harm me!

(2 votes, 50%)

Are you crazy? Pukors are complete rubbish.

(0 votes, 0%)

The Quibbler is rubbish.

(0 votes, 0%)

Pukor?

(0 votes, 0%)

I'd rather eat Nargles than read this.

(0 votes, 0%)

Poll Totals:
Total Votes: 4
Total Voters: 3

Author

Topic: Quibbler, December 1975. Holiday Edition (Read 206 times)

Samwise and Sarah
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Quibbler, December 1975. Holiday Edition
« Thread Started on Aug 3, 2007, 12:12pm »

It’s that time of year again! Yes, Christmas plagues us yet again. According to father Christmas as they say. His wife and him have so relational difficulties so, beware. He may have given you a little bird. They look like plimpies, but they are dangerous. The “plimpie” in question is in fact a Pukor. It differs from the plimpie in such a way that its menacing red eyes have heat vision that can blind you in seconds. Cory McHabbert tells his encounter of a Pukor.

“I opened up my present,” says seven-year-old Cory to our Quibbler Staff. “ And the birdie had red eyes and it looked at me. And then, I couldn’t see hear, or nothing.” Whether or not that this may have resulted from a Crumpled Horn-Snorkack is unknown. But we insure to keep your holidays Snorkack and Pukor free.

Some rumors have it that Albus Dumbledore may be father Christmas. “No,” he says to ravished reporters. “I do not make it habit to send up blowing plimpies to children. I find this to be a poor result of a Conjunctivitis curse set by an impending Death Eater.” Our Staff disagree. Pukors must be warded. In fact, wearing a frog leg as a ring seems to ward away this unwanted intruder.

In other news, Nargles seem to have made a comeback. Nargles tend to infest mistletoes and when it’s this close to Christmas, it’s a scary sign. Relationships end every year because of this travesty, as Arbold Heymorn cares to inform us.

“My girlfriend and I were at a date at Madam Puddifoot’s and she pointed at the mistletoe. I told her it was infested with Nargles and said it would be bad luck to kiss her. She slapped me until I was on my knees, begging her to stop. It was horrible. I had those lashes for weeks.”

Unless you want to end up like our friend Arbold, it is highly suggested that you carry around Kerosene spray. Nargle HATE this spray and it’s a surfire cure to the obscure. Don’t leave the house with out it!

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